It's also the one fandom I refuse to read meta on, write meta on, or even discuss with anyone outside of carefully screened people who love it like I do, because everyone has their personal fandom of max crazy and this is mine. I'm also weirdly protective of season six, which I can't explain in any logical sense because I didn't even like half of it, but I kind of lose all perspective when anyone critiques it and want to crush things. So you know. There is that.
Eps watched this run:
The Pack - the one and only time I found Xander insanely hot. Just. What the hell, Xander. It wasn't him being a dick, which did nothing for me and I cheered as Buffy kicked his ass. IT was the sniffing and the pack thing. Which should have warned me what I'd end up writing in SGA and Merlin that involved smell, pack, sniffing, and um, cannibalism. Yeah. This is where it started, right here. Goddamn Xander, the pack, the sniffing, and well, eating the principal.
The Prom - just the ending. I loved the school giving Buffy the adorable umbrella. I tear up every time.
Graduation Day Part I and II - the students all go to war! And the mayor's life dream was to turn into a giant snake. I'm glad he had that before he was slaughtered. It's nice to know some dreams really do come true.
Hush - I have wanted to watch for awhile, but timing is everything, that is, getting Child to watch with me. That freaks me the hell out still. THE GRINNING. THE STRAIGHTJACKET HENCHMAN. The legit scariest ep of Buffy I ever watched.
The Yoko Factor - the awesomeness of the gang dealing with all their issues from the whole year.
Primeval - the entire ep, but especially the union spell so they could take out Adam. Scooby soulbonding never goes out of style.
The Body - really should have thought that one through more before watching. Stopped early.
The Weight of the World - Buffy angst is my favorite thing ever.
One More, With Feeling - I watch this like, several times a year straight through. There is nothing not perfect about this ep.
Lessons - just love
Same Time, Same Place - if there is intensive Scooby bonding, I am there. I love this ep.
Help - this one always breaks my heart a little.
Selfless - Anya's angst. Seriously, my love for Anya is unending and I haven't quite forgiven Joss for letting her die in the finale and Andrew live, because Andrew is freaking Jar Jar Binks and why does he survive?
Him - there is nothing more hilarious than Willow about to do a sex change spell on RJ. I mean, I kind of wish she'd gone through with that, just to see what happened next.
Showtime - for the huge drama of Thunderdome
Touched - for Buffy/Spike bonding and drama.
End of Days - For same, plus my love for Faith is very much here.
Chosen - because it's perfect
Upcoming is The Gift, which makes me cry a lot, every time, and 1-10 of season six. I kind of have to work my way through those interspersed with other eps. And season 5.1, Buffy vs Dracula, because Xander as Renfield never gets old like, ever. And then I cheer myself by watching the Faith episodes of Angel to see Faith beat the hell out of Conner, because there is nothing more satisfying than seeing the most irritating teenager in history get beat down for like, two entire episodes. Then probably an end of season six run up from Tara's death to Evil!Willow.
I continue to absolutely hate Andrew with all my being and still do not get why he was even there, why he survived, or well, why he even existed. I mean, why not Jonathan, dammit? HE AT LEAST HAD A HISTORY WITH BUFFY THAT WAS NON DOUCHE AND THEN HE REDEEMED HIMSELF AFTER BEING A DOUCHE. I liked Jonathan. I would not have resented Jonathan taking up valuable air onscreen.
And because I like to mix it with vids, vids!
Teenage Dream, Buffy/Spike
Without You I'm Nothing, Buffy/Spike - the vid of Buffy's self-hatred. It just breaks me.
Say When, Buffy/Spike - the vid of Spike and Buffy's tragic love, because I love the mirroring in this one
You Found Me - All - probably my favorite Buffy vid ever. It's the Scoobies and their tragedies and their friendship and kind of everything I love about the show in a Fray song.
Crawling, Faith - Faith's rise and fall and rise and everything in between.
Not Enough, All - kind of the opposite of You Found Me - it's all the angst and pain and hopelessness and the fact they can't even stop to grieve
Blurry, Buffy/Angel - a really intense look at Buffy/Angel and the just--gah. Doomed. So very doomed.
It's The End of the World As We Know It by Luminosity and Kamil, All - it's the end of the world like a lot in Buffyland.
And three I can't find online and so uploaded to Mediafire for download. The first was removed from youtube, the other two predate youtube.
Running Up That Hill, Buffy/Spike - I am really into their tragic relationship, okay? Format: mp4, plays with VLC and pretty much anything
I Remember, Buffy/Angel - seasons one and two following the tragic course of their relationship and the song is perfect. Format: rmvb, plays with VLC
Without a Sound, Buffy - gorgeous Buffy vid, I think season one only, maybe season two as well. Format: mpg, plays with VLC
During the premiere of The Gift my hysterical sobbing led a friend on AIM to desperately send me fic to read, even though at the time I read no Buffy fic for above reasons, but she promised I would love it and also, it would motivate me to stop crying before my eyes were too swollen to avoid questions at work the next day on what the hell happened to me, on the off-chance I was able to ever stop crying and there was doubt that would be possible.
(Seriously, I sobbed on AIM, I sobbed off AIM, I sobbed until page two of The Heart's Filthy Lesson and then there was awesome fic and then I read spoilers for season six and sobbed only when people mentioned the episode in my presence. People stopped doing that fairly quickly, which is probably the reason I can still see.)
The Bowiebharata by rivkat and mustangsally78, Spike/Buffy - The Heart's Filthy Lesson was sent to me in PDF, but for Serious Moonlight, I had to patiently collect email posts on glass_onion one at a time, format them, and set them lovingly into a word document I still have and both were printed out tenderly and placed in a binder and protected fiercely, as this was before I had broadband and kindles were still science fiction. Then there was Changes, and then Buffy Summers and the Spiders From Mars, which added in so much delicious pastry as a major plot point that it's kind of my platonic ideal of the perfect fic now.
Historical Note: When rivkat started writing Clark/Lex in Smallville, I spent quality time wondering if I could actually unconsciously bend reality to do my bidding, because rivkat was writing Clark/Lex and my life was perfect. I have not yet discarded this theory, but mostly because I keep thinking if I wish hard enough, there will be one more Bowiebharata post-season seven sent to me from an alternate universe or something. This could happen.
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