Log in

No account? Create an account

The Toybox

people for the conservation of limited amounts of indignation

Previous Entry Share Flag Next Entry
life lived like a terrible lesson on betrayal
children of dune - leto 1
Horace the gall bladder last night concocted a stealth attack that started as what I thought was a backache around threeish. Around seven, I was ready to take out my fucking gallbladder myself with an exacto-knife and a soldering iron if I could move or keep my hands steady (suddenly, my new tools had all new functions, you have no idea). I resent the fact it tricks me starting in my back--who notices a mild backache?--then it suddenly starts to spread like watching the superflu spread in fast-forward in The Stand.

Okay, see, that was beyond hideously painful and terrible and everything, but retrospectively, it did not help my state of mind that the only position in the world that I could manage that didn't make me start screaming was slumped over a large pile of pillows with my ass in the air. And my relatives saw this!

It's bad enough that it hurts like Christ are you kidding me, what the fuck is wrong with you, Horace; bad enough that I chewed vicodin and it did very much not much; salt on the wound is that personal dignity was sacrificed so dramatically and sadly, like one expects a proctological exam in bed outside of obscure and very specialized role-play, and I do not judge kinks but hey, that's not my kink so I got very little out of it on a psychological level.

I wish my sense of humor didn't seem to short out during times like that; that shit is hilarious and if Child had any kind of sense he'd have taken pictures for blackmail purposes. However, my doctor was kind and called in a script for me of vicodin--not that it does much as far as I can tell, but the placebo is nice--and with any kind of luck, the appointment with a surgeon will be made while the memories of this are still really fresh.

Seriously, what did people do before surgery and painkillers? I have never in my life so much appreciated I was born in the age of electricity, chemicals, the internet, and pharmacies. A lot of really bizarre historical facts makes a lot more sense to me if I translate it through the filter of gall bladder went insane. I mean, I used to say that labor with Child was bad, but labor a.) had an actual purpose and b.) hello, epidural. This just appears at random (no idea what set it off this time) and just hurts for the fuck of it.

I am beginning to fear food. I am staring suspiciously at the pantry. This can't be healthy.

This message was brought to you by Seperis's incredibly unhappy body, who is currently voting organ by organ to turn on Horace and go medieval on his ass like now.

Posted at Dreamwidth: http://seperis.dreamwidth.org/26909.html. | You can reply here or there. | comment count unavailable comments

Horace is out of hand - he must be stopped. I'm sending death rays with my mind.

Hopefully the vicodin (mmmm...vicodin) has kicked in and you can slump over your pillows in a lovely haze. Thinking good thoughts!!!!

Terrifyingly enough, vicodin does very little for gallbladder pain. I've had it for surgical pain, so I know how it's supposed to go (Pain? Yep, still there, but pretty much irrelevant), but it makes just about half a little dent in gallbladder pain when it's really bad. This sort of makes it worse, because that was supposed to help.

Seriously, what did people do before surgery and painkillers? I have never in my life so much appreciated I was born in the age of electricity, chemicals, the internet, and pharmacies.
This reminds me of the best-worst subplot of HBO's 'Deadwood', with the horrific passing of the stone. *shudders*

That is so epically shitty, dude.

My mom had the exact same thing as you. Sometimes I catch her reminiscing about having her gall bladder removed and calling it her Happy Miracle Working Fun Times Express Tour, so you do have something to look forward to. I'm pretty sure mom has her surgeon somewhere in her will.

I went through natural childbirth with kid who has a huge-ass head (with some complications that will essentially scar you for life if I go into detail), and pain from my gallbladder was worse. Can they move up your surgery? (I lived on Gatorade and soda crackers for three months).

I"m hoping? My doctor has to refer to the surgeon, the surgeon calls me in to consult, blah blah blah--but if it gets worse and teh painkillers dont' work (or tehre's fever, etc), I think his advice was to go to the ER straight away. I'm pretty sure he's moving up the consult now, though. *crosses fingers*

And dear God. *sends hugs* I read (many years later) on LJ on childbirth forums about so many natural childbirths that I'm still getting over it.

I am so sorry you are suffering so much pain. Here's hoping that Horace behaves himself till he can be stopped.

That sounds absolutely godawful. I think you've redefined "adding insult to injury" for the 21st century.

I'm not sure that even if that was one's kink, being stuck ass-in-the-air while in agony in full view of relatives would be at all awesome. Unless you had a very *specific* kink.

When is your surgery scheduled?

If it's not SOON, can you find a video on youtube demonstrating the DIY version?

Down with Horace!

The only position that helped, for me, was huddled face down in a little ball on the floor - carpeted floor, it had to be, not anything more comfortable nor anything harder, hell if I know why - with knees tucked up, one arm over my head, and one arm twisted awkwardly underneath me so that it pressed all along my front. I think gallbladders like to injure our dignity as well as making us miserable physically. It's the only explanation.

Gallbladders are obviously anti-dignity - 'Satan' often has me in a similar position, kin to the position one would adopt when grovelling for some sick, sadistic, twisted reason.

YES THIS. JUST LIKE THIS. I think I ended up with cramps in my thighs, but didn't notice for the other pain.

He's probably acting up because you gave him an undignified name. The guy from Dr. Quinn? Really? Really?

Hey! Dr. Quinn was totally an awesome show! :P

Dude, before painkillers and surgery, I'm pretty sure that people didn't live this long. :/ Don't worry, I'm sure that next time, Child will know better and take lots of pictures.

I must say I agree about living in the age of pharmacies. At least your pain has a definite cause. Mine just leaves my doctor scratching their head and throwing random drugs my way. I hope you feel better soon!

What did they do before surgery and such? Well, my grandmother died of gallbladder disease (in the 30s, way before I was born but even then surgery was available) so be glad for modern medicine.

Probably time to get that baby cleaned out or cut out or something.

I sort of wonder if our forebears were made of sterner stuff than we are. I mean... George Washington lived with horrific tooth and jaw pain most of his life, and yet it's well known that he was adored as one of the most genial and friendly gentlemen you'd ever want to meet. I have a root canal scheduled for next week and if I didn't have Motrin, I'd be snapping at people and generally making a terror of myself to anyone near me.

Here's hoping Horace makes nice! Or that they prescribe a better drug for you!

Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry. I had my gallbladder out a little over two years ago, and I only had 2 attacks before that. I've never had a baby, but I've been told by multiple people that gallbladder pain is much worse than childbirth. And yeah, vicodin barely made a dent in it.

I hope your doctor told you that if the pain does not stop, and/or you spike a fever, you're to go directly to the ER. You do not want that shizz getting infected or god forbid bursting.

Everyone is different, but for me personally, I've not had to make much change to my diet since the surgery. In my experience, the only thing that's bad is if I eat a high-fat meal on an empty stomach. I've learned to include some cheese or other dairy with my first meal of the day to kind of jump start bile production, and then everything seems to go just fine.

I hope you don't have to suffer through much more of this before your surgery.


If this has already been covered, please ignore!

So, I’ve a large family, three out of four of them are women and there are only two of us who still have our gallbladder. You can tell what generation a women’s in by her scar. Having said that – until you can get the surgery, try a bit of vinegar. It often seems to help ease off the attacks. Half a table spoon of pickle juice (once a day) works pretty well for some. After the surgery look into taking digestive enzymes – you can get them just about anywhere, and they help with some of the aftereffects. And if you start getting a green cast to your skin, don’t wait – go to the ER right then.

Also, don’t be afraid to look for other options for being sedated then general anesthesia; I’m one of those people who absolutely cannot be given it so they give me something that seems like it knocks me out but apparently? I’m awake for the whole thing. Just with no memory of it.