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The Toybox

people for the conservation of limited amounts of indignation

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when you can't tell a bad joke, what can you do?
children of dune - leto 1
I seriously, seriously loathe my period. I mean, it used to be academic? Like, I didn't really feel anything more than mild dislike, but apparently, I've never had my period when I'm in the middle of writing-farr--maybe it's never happened before, I don't know, I never put writing farr on the calendar before and matched up--and I keep losing my train of thought. And I'm at twenty pages a goddamn day right now and I'll lose my nerve and start wondering if I really want to use 'tortures cats' as a punchline for a joke.

...seriously, it is really funny, in context. I hope. God, what if it isn't? I could be basing an entire conversation on a punchline that doesn't work.

See what my uterus does? This is what it does. It makes cat jokes not funny. I hate everything. I'm really glad I shared this.

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vissy and I were just discussing the other day how our menstrual cycles affected our writing (in particular writing porn). I shared with her my secret fear that after menopause I may lose the ability to write even such poor porn as I currently produce. *sigh*

Anyway - you have my sympathies. The good thing - this shall pass!

You know something about uteri? I think they laugh at us. I think they absolutely beam at our misery. I think Stalin was reincarnated into a uterus somewhere out there.

I'm pretty convinced that uteri have a union in which they exchange new and creative ways to torture us. It's the only explanation I can think of for my behavior each month- just when I think I know what to expect *bam* new bag of tricks to deal with.

Don't worry, tortured cats is HILARIOUS. [coughs] I mean, in context.

The things fandom has made me say...

A few months ago I got tested for Vitamin D levels and I was kind of low so I started taking supplements. Ever since then my periods have been much less crampy and weird. Who knew!

Holy crap, suddenly a lot of the pain I've experienced over the years makes sense given my own propensity for low D levels. I wish I'd known this years before menopause kicked in!

*raises hand!* 9 out of 100! My doctor said that's a personal record for him, I take 2000IU every day and an extra 1000IU every so often just for a kick. *hisses at the sun*




Oh, and also *SYMPATHETIC HUGS!!*

This is why I started using my hormonal BC in ways that prevent me from having so many. At least, it's part of the reason.

How I wish the birth control that lets you have only a period or three a year was around back in the day, I'd have begged my doctor for a blessed, blessed prescription.

And *anything* can be funny if it's written right, so good luck with the, you know, cat thing.

...and I'll lose my nerve and start wondering if I really want to use 'tortures cats' as a punchline for a joke.


As reginagiraffe commented -- Vitamin D. Take 1000 I.U. of Vitamin D and 250g. of magnesium and adjust as needed. You'll be sane again in no time. Well... ;-)

I wonder if this is because your period tends to send you into a PWP mindset and that state tends to conflict with your own plot-heavy writing tendencies? Kicks you out of writing farr, or sort of keeps you from being in that state during the days in question?

Have you tried the contraceptive injections or an implant? I haven't had a period for over a year and a half now which is when I started the injections (I have an implant now for less hassle) and it is marvellous.

I woke up wanting to kill motherfuckers, was seven minutes late to work and my boss was like "You should really be on time," and I say in my best Spock voice, "Yes, that was unfortunate." I am so right there with you.

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