Log in

No account? Create an account

The Toybox

people for the conservation of limited amounts of indignation

Previous Entry Share Next Entry
my problems are more awesome than yours
children of dune - leto 1
I feel like sulking prodigiously for reasons that have to with my realization that I have a really mundane fantasy life. I mean, catch this, some people are undead shaman-wizards and...

Oh, should I stop there?

Level with me; are we doing this wrong? I mean, I'm just saying my imagination feels inadequate and that is the penis size of the fandom world, if you will forgive the patriarchal aspects and stop to visualize that for a second, because seriously, it's hilarious.

I'm not sure where I was going with this, but I am just saying I do not feel virile anymore. Or--okay, yes, I googled that, right word, possibly context is creepy and--well, wrong, but I have been dealt an emotionally challenging blow. Did you not see comparisons to penises?

*curls up* Hate.

  • 1
Oh god, you're awesome. Imagination as the penis size of fandom!

*dies laughing*

I like limitless flattery!

Well, you know what they say: it's not the meat, it's the motion.

Given a porn schlong that dicks people over and average sized cock that shows people a really good time, I'll choose the joe-average cock every time.

I don't know; I think the existence of mpreg as a genre argues a preference for bigger.

being attacked by a 16th century undead shaman wizard is no laughing matter, Jenn.

if it were a 17th century undead shaman wizard, that'd be different.

although if you are having problems with virility I believe writing an AU where Adam Lambert is a Vulcan would help!

...you mean someone hasn't yet?

See, though - they're taking pictures of their small-to-average e-dong and photoshopping them into something considerably bigger. You can tell it's shopped, but that's not stopping them from waving it in your face.

Your metaphor is awesome in new and exciting ways.

(Deleted comment)
Less creepy than the original. I was hitting Fatal Attraction by way of Flowers in the Attic for a while there. that can't be healthy.

You want it emailed? It's nearly done.

Honestly? I don't think undead shaman-wizards are a sign of imagination. More like a sign of tossing a bunch of potentially awesome words into a random phrase generator, and hitting "go".

Elven ranger-warrior.

Phantasmic weretiger.

See? Easy cakes. As others have already commented, it's quality you want to strive for, not quantity.

...I want to be an elven ranger-wizard and arrange marriages for my flist with people on the astral plane!

Okay, that's been done. DAMMIT.

I have to say that I never thought I'd see the day when a fan lapsing in and out of a coma and signing stories to her brother would be considered boring.

I need context for that like air right now.


(Deleted comment)
I wonder what the fannish equivalent of viagra is?

Well, we can't all be undead shaman-wizards. :|

*sulks* Stupid early adopter of cool alternate selves.

Oh my god, if you have a small fandom-penis I'm concerned I am NOT ENDOWED AT ALL.


...you know what, I'm just gonna leave that there.

Anyway, feel free to come spam me and/or sob at me!

Hee! I might! I have retooled and rewrote three versions now. It's very-weird.


When someone imagines undead shaman wizard zombie TRIPLETS, then you should worry.

See, now I feel derivative if I go there. He is taking all the good ideas!

  • 1