The first is my period, always. I can write it down, I can track it on a calendar, but it is always an eternal surprise. What madness is this? I feel homicidal against air! Why God, why do you send me this crazy? And you know, then all comes clear, and I'm yet again marveling at the weird way my memory just shuts down despite almost twenty years of this. I mean, there are people on my flist who can predict me by my entries--you think I'm kidding, a couple OF them proved it once in comments and dear God, my shame--but I never seen it unless it happens to occur to me that suddenly my reading for three days slides from ooh plot to so my reading log has a lot of porn suddenly, but even then, it doesn't sink in.
The second is dehydration. I know I'm dehydrated, and I mean this literally, when svmadelyn, over chat ffs, tells me I am. I have a headache, I say, grumpy. Coffee isn't helping. I feel sick. I think I'm dying. Do you want my laptop?
[To be fair, coffee actually does wipe out allergy headaches sometimes. I mean, I'm a caffeine addict, but it's for a lot of reasons. Or so I claim.]
Mmm hmm she says, and I almost say cherry coke, because I am spiteful, but that's a story for another day. Hey, you had any water today?
And like that, I remember, get up, and drink two glasses of water and bring a third back to the laptop. In thirty minutes, I'm fine.
I hate you, I tell her moodily. Hey, what are you reading?
This passes for normal conversation for us in the last half-decade that we've avoided killing each other.
Anyway, I realized that this works without her being here, as I was in the kitchen, with a headache, making a cup of coffee this morning after a long day of headache and not sure what the hell is up with that (I went to bed at nine okay? I didn't go to bed that early when I was hospitalized. It was that icky.), and suddenly, there's this voice--You have a headache?
Me: This is like, proof I'm on the internet too much, isn't it?
Hey, you had any water today?
Two glasses now, thanks. I'll finish the third before I go to work.