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The Toybox

people for the conservation of limited amounts of indignation

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there's a great deal to be said for less obsessive hobbies. what, though, i have no idea.
brown flower
So I am up early due to the fact that shinetheway was staring at my AIM window demanding--demanding--fic and then--okay. Fic-farr. Yes, I stole the concept from vidders, who got it from Star Trek, but. Fic-farr. I was--seriously--doodling down this idea I'd thought was funny and then it was twelve hours later and I have a ten thousand word count and a plot. And I tried to sleep--I mean, I did. At which time I mentally counted off the minutes until I could legitimately claim I'd tried to sleep so I could get up and go back and write more of it. Because it's not near done. There's a plot, and it's also not funny anymore, and I have a vague suspicion someone is going to die by sword in the very near word-count future. Which you know, I approve of, so it's not like I'm complaining. Personally, I feel any fic can be made better with a death by sword. Preferably when Arthur is holding the sword. And sword is not being used as a euphemism for cock. Because that's wrong.

This is that freaking Dean/Castiel novel all over again, I swear. I was writing that one like if I stopped I'd bleed out on the floor or something. And it's just sitting there now. With no middle. But a great deal of porn. You can see how my priorities work. I always, always remember the porn.

I also discovered when I went back (ten minutes ago, give or take), with a kind of numb terror, that there is het. Which I have no problem with, if I were writing a het story. I don't even know what is going on, but I think it says something about me as a writer that writing het feels kinky. Which is weird, as my first two fandoms were het and once I stopped blushing myself into random fevers, I was all over the porn. And I still am. But there was this period of time where shinetheway and I were almost competitively hetting via AIM and I suddenly I realized there is no reason for anyone to go for the lube.

Lesson: write more het so you aren't so disturbed by writing about your own sexuality, kay?

Yeah, like that's going to take.

So all this hideous oversharing is to justify the following question--was the word clit in existence during Dark Ages Albion? As you know, we are all about the tomato sandwich historical accuracy. More specifically, is that going to be a dealbreaker? I mean, granted, Merlin is the fandom of slash dragons and Merlin being double-dicked by Arthur and Uther*. Clit cannot possibly be that revolutionary, comparatively speaking. And I will kill myself with my own keyboard if I have to go the euphemism route, because everything I know about euphemisms I learned from romance novels and badfic. Look at my icon. Does anyone really want to leave this to me flailing desperately for euphemisms? Really? Ponder that for a while.

* Oh hell no I am not linking to this. You can find it how I did--click on a fic with a Merlin/Arthur tag in delicious and find out someone forgot to mention a third cock and its owner are present, enthusiastically. Also, person who did this--one day. One day.

Adding: I have a faint suspicion that some time after I've slept, I will read this and really, really hate myself.

If it makes you feel better, you can always put the lube back in. No reason it can't be used after all......

This is true. *thoughtful*

a) I could have lived without knowing about the double-dicking. No, really. If there was ever a time for the universe to strike me with spontaneous fictional amnesia, THIS WOULD BE IT D:

b) unless people start worrying about whether cock or dick were used as descriptors for the purple-headed womb broom (thank you, weepingcock thank you so much), I think clit is perfectly acceptable.

c) DEATH BY SWORD! :D :D <3 <3 <3

a.) shared trauma is diminished trauma. Or at least, it amuses me.

b.) ...are you kidding? Tell me you are kidding. Lie to me.

c.) srsly. Death by sword == awesome.

was the word clit in existence during Dark Ages Albion?

I think that is the wrong question. *g* Merlin isn't a historical drama that depicts "real history", it's a family fantasy program that reflects current sensibilities (eleanorb said it much better in her comments here). That means clit would be perfectly fine whereas references to "real history" that isn't part of the show's canon might appear out of place.

Edited at 2009-03-29 02:31 pm (UTC)

Good point. I'm not so much worried about perfect historical accuracy as perceived historical accuracy, if that makes sense. IE, what the normal reader reading would find invisible, and what they would find too jarring in context.


I've written two since you abandoned me to die. Well, one and this one. *smug*

Personally, clit would not be deal breaker, no.

Also, I'm a little bit stupidly excited by what you've just described. Just so you know.


If it resolves at under fifty thousand words, I'll be content. I totally do not have the energy to do this for five nights running.

[grins] I woke up this morning with the vague headachy feeling that I get with a hangover, except I didn't drink last night. And there was a page of porn on my bedside table. Fic-farr describes the feeling perfectly. And really makes me want to write that pon farr!Merlin story.

Also, holy crap, my log of that whole thing runs to *158KB*. [gleeful]

was the word clit in existence during Dark Ages Albion? ... More specifically, is that going to be a dealbreaker?

Considering the forks and tomatoes and cathedral glass and velvet and fitted, soled shoes and hardbound books and steel weapons and, oh, yeah, dragons and unicorns and griffons, I don't think it's a big deal.

Y'know, honestly, trying to fix 'Merlin' in a real, historical context seems a slightly farcical endevour -- have you seen the 'Behind the Scenes' featurette on the DVD? The director practically falls all over himself emphasizing that the setting is deliberately anachronistic. If the creators are going out of their way to be vague, it seems kind of futile to get worked up about 'accuracy'.

It happens to artists too. You sit down and open up your notebook/art program/whatever and a few hours later you surface out of this sort of daze and there's art in front of you. And you're really not quite sure how or even if you did that, except your hand is kind of cramped, so obviously you must have.

I don't think "clit" could be terribly out of place. It wouldn't break the flow for me, anyway.

I want fic now! Because death by sword!

"Clit" wouldn't be a dealbreaker for me. Honestly, the only anachronistic thing/concept that's been a dealbreaker for me in all the Merlin fic I've read so far has been the twentieth-century concept of gay (including usage of the word attached to the concept), and it's totally possible I'm the only one who even noticed/cared.

Also? I was very cranky when I got up this morning (short version: I feel your lack of sleep issue, only mine had almost no productivity attached, which sucks), but I am now immensely cheered up and looking forward to long and engrossing fic from you at some point in the near future.

Also also? I'm totally going to pretend you said "...Merlin being double-dicked by Arthur and Lancelot." Yes. Because the other? Does not exist. No, it DOES NOT EXIST. La la la la I CAN'T HEAR YOU. *pets mental health lovingly*

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shinetheway wanted us to all write Merlin pon-farr. She's a bit evil and nefarious brilliant like that.

Also, I've never written explicit het, but I can imagine it being a bit odd after writing slash for a while.

Well, according to the online dictionary "clitoris" originated between 1605 and 1615...

You're so cute when you're in love with a fandom/writing.:) Yay for Jenn fic farr!

I haven't read enough Merlin yet to really know what might *feel* anachronistic to most readers. I'm guessing you're fine with clit. Heh.

Put it this way: I'm sure that *someone* knew about the clit in Arthurian times, and called it something. But since we're not speaking in old english *thank god*, I wouldn't worry about it.


The Romans had a term, if you're really worried?

shinetheway was talking about pon-farr at the minimerlin meetup. Sounds great.

For me, clit is not a deal breaker any more than are tomatoes or potatoes or high heels in Camelot. I want to read the story! Please! :)