(I actually kind of wanted to beat something. Coitus interruptus is not pleasant even by proxy.)
To say that I feel vaguely fictionally schizophrenic is to understate the case. I could have been a knitter. Knitters do not angst over comma placement and the entire history of cavalry. Nor do they try to read translations of Xenophon for plot points.
(They also aren't reading Catullus for context. Just look at that sentence. There is no part of me that doesn't want to cry that I'm being serious. And I never was a classics girl.)
ETA: *Grins* I bow to the knitters who have explained their gauge stress. I crochet. I feel your pain. I just never had to get a Latin dictionary while I crochet. Though now I am kind of afraid there are, in fact, knitters and crocheters who in fact do use classic Latin patterns and I may just have to die.