Winterlive!
Fiction!
The Plague!
I went to the doctor to slump sadly in a chair until I became bored, then played with the reflex hammer. In case anyone is curious, my knee reflexes are in fact working quite well. After kicking for a while, I kept using the foam to clean my hands off so as not to transport my death germs to other people and I think started getting a skin-related high from the alcohol content and carried on a spirited conversation with the doctor that in no way required her to actually answer. Bet that was fun for her.
So here is what we know. I have no lung congestion ("You have no congestion in your lungs!" she says in surprise. "I had pneumonia," I say grimly, leaning over to cough deliberately into a paper towel. "I cough." "Still..." "I cough with a torture device from Seton," I say, coughing again. "There will be no lung congestion. The food was terrible there." That's a lie. Their chicken lasagna was quite acceptable.) I have head congestion and sneezing and a note for work about my tragedy. I have bronchitis, which--okay? I mean, I am not going to argue or anything. I start something called Z-Pack antibiotics, but first I need to find my very special anti-nausea medication, because that shit is not on, and I remember the last time they gave me mysterious antibiotics and the death-nausea. I think this is throwing off my thyroid medication, but honestly, my entire immune system is in some kind of rebellion, so the only surprise at this point is that no one started making worried noises about x-rays so there could be more marveling at the odd that is my body.
Fool-proof way to cough is to laugh, and earlier, I told my mom the bear joke that
And that concludes my Friday. I'm going to go look for merlinrps now, because I discovered my feelings on rps are like, directly proportional to how much non-rps I have to read and I am running out of things to read.
I also have tissues now a day after using paper towels and my nose hates me like some cats hate water. (My cat never did. So it's weird to say that.)
ETA: Sweet Child o' Mine by Taken by Trees is literally now the creepiest song I own. Also, it should be vidded.