(It just occurred to me yesterday that indeed, this is the fandom that the Magical Healing Penis could in fact be a perfectly legitimate trope. I leave you all to mull this appropriately. And by that, I mean, people. Magical Healing Penis. Write that shit already.)
(Also where we can say "Dragons made them do it" and be totally canon-compliant.)
However. That did not happen. As around five-thirty, while looking happily at dinner, Child came to tell me that the bathroom is under two inches (two inches. TWO INCHES) of water with no end in sight.
I don't know how long it takes to turn one's bathroom into a shallow pond. But the toilet was doing its best to see that it become a lake. After an epic war with the shut-off thingie, there was two inches (Two. Fucking. Inches.) of water on my floor and we wo'nt discuss what happened to my boots because I will cry. Also, to the carpet outside both doors of the bathroom and into my bedroom.
So after embracing the wet-dry vac (that was--scary. Gallons of water people. Gallons), I came to two conclusions.
1.) Internal plumbing is evil.
2.) I really need a nap.
3.) That carpet better not mildew before I can finish getting it dry.
4.) Oh God, my boots. My boots. Never will I ever leave boots anywhere but a high shelf safe from the random possibility of flooding.
(WTF? How the hell was I supposed to anticipate random flooding of bathroom?)
In any event, life hard, wish for cookie, hate universe.
But. This made it better.
In Omne Tempus by