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The Toybox

people for the conservation of limited amounts of indignation

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i'm not worried at all
awesome bunny
So I don't wear socks anymore.

Yes, this is an earthshattering revelation, I know. But it's true, and here is something totally unrelated, or so you think.

I lose things a lot.

I have this theory. About socks, loss, and the Conservation of Lost Matter: to wit, we have to lose so many things in a lifetime. Items are rated on some sort of esoteric Sock God scale. So we have socks, pens, keys, books, tonsils, virginity, appendix, what have you. I have this feeling the fact I don't wear socks is directly related to how often I lose my phone, my keys, my shoes, and my purse; now that I have no socks to lose, the loss has to be taken up in some other way.

In other news, first day of class today. I am not stressed at all, even though looking at the syllable might, to a different person, cause a cold sweat of fear. I have no fear.

(Seriously. The syllabus. Gah.)

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That makes sense, in a scary, scary kind of way. ::clings to appendix::

Does this mean I should finally throw out all those unmatched socks I have left in my drawer, so as to protect my other belongings?

My grandfather calls it The Sock God, who must be appeased. I feel a vague need to go find every unmatched sock in the house and throw it in the dryer.

...I want to keep my tonsils.

What if I find someone else's sock in my things when I bring my clothes up from the laundry room? If I bring it back downstairs, have I just condemned someone to an hours-long search for their keys?

Hmm. Maybe you get credit for their sock?

Huh. The ways of the Sock God are mysterious, aren't they?


He's like Cthulhu, in a way. Just with less human sacrifice and living in a dryer instead of a sunken city. The resemblance? Striking. I think they're third cousins once removed.

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*dies* Okay, that is awesome. *keeps giggling*

My socks disappear into the Blackhole of Socks. I've taken to wearing flip-flops and shoes that don't require socks, because I like them better, and I don't have to buy socks all the damn time because I only use them for work now.

*grins* Most of my shoes are sock-less. It worries me now. *chews lip* The Sock Gods do not like to be trifled with.

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I still have no idea of the value of virginity in socks, though. Or tonsils.

But how do you keep your feet warm?

Texas. It is rarely cold enough to need socks.

That's useful. Except for the part where I wouldn't cope well with heat in summer (which for me is everything above 25°C). See, I really dislike the feeling of wearing socks, but unfortunately my feet feel cold easily, so frequently I'm forced to wear two pairs even in winter though it's not even all that cold here.

You're not alone--most Texans don't cope well in the heat of summer. It isn't quite like an oven, but the resemblance can be terribly striking.

I never lose my socks. But dammit, I keep losing my virginity. I can never keep track of the bastard.

It's too freaking cold where I live to not wear socks, but I've found a way to avoid the Sock Gods - I wear different coloured socks. I figure why not add a bit more colour to an area that people don't usually see (pants + boots/slippers = no one sees my socks) and it's a way to get around the Sock Gods. Although I'm pretty sure they know what I'm trying to do and instead satisfy themselves by stealing my pajamas and shirts. I also think they slip out of the dryer and steal my notes when they get the chance. There has to be some reason why I can't find them when I try to study for exams. :)

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