Child: Mom, who's that big guy on Stargate?
Child: No. On the other one. The big black guy?
Child: Yes! HE IS SO COOL. Can you get me all of Stargate?
Me: *looks at amazon, pales: ten seasons* Uh.
Child went on to wax lyrical on Teal'c and John Sheppard. I--never thought they were all that comparable. Until you ask Child. Child's ideal team is now Dr. Who, John Sheppard, and Teal'c. He hasnt' chosen a fourth.
...you know? That team has possibilities. I wonder how Child will like Cameron Mitchell.
(Sometimes, my favorite part of any discussion with Child is his complete openness to crossovers. As far as he's concerned, Boa Versus Python and Jimmy Neutron can not only happen in the same universe, they really *should*.)
Child and I have doctor's appointments in the morning. There really doesn't seem to be that much worry about a relapse so much as precautionary.
I have to admit; I am kind of scared.
I mean, I know I shouldn't be. I'm not having the same symptoms really; the cough, for one thing, is what they were tryign to get me to do last time, since the big problem seemed to be my chest congestion wasnt' loose enough to cough out. And there really isn't a shortness of breath or tiredness other than that connected with the fact that I'm really congested and that's fairly normal. There's no fever and no real problems breathing, and I fished out my inhaler, since that is what they gave me last time, and it does help a lot. And--I've never been in actual danger; both hospital stays, while kind of scary, were never at the ICU or even the intermediate (except for one day that first time in November). Both times were directly related to the fact that the chest congestion was causing problems breathing, but never in the she-will-die-in-one-hour type of way, and once that cleared up, then I was usually let out with scripts for home.
And point; both times, it was a month in coming. For the November one, I was complaining about it back in October, and the April one, svmadelyn had noticed something wrong as far back as March when we were in Chicago. There's been just this week this time; for the last couple of months, other than some short term isolated days, I've been usually clear of allergies. The worst I got was a few bad headaches when the mold count was freakishly high and everyone was feeling crappy at work.
I guess what's bothering me is that we still don't know what it is, they're still arguing over it being pneumonia or not, and I just can't figure out what's triggering it.
And I guess this thing last night didnt' help. I was talking to svmadelyn and kept vaguely phasing out. Not a big deal, I was getting tired easily, and that's always happened when I'm really tired. But this was oddly strong, so I said bye and shut down, and went to the kitchen to make sure everything was put up nad make the coffee for tomorrow. And this--I don't know how to describe it other tahn this wave of exhaustion swept over me, except it wasn't like exhaustion or weakness, it was just--my body said, no more moving, no more standing, no more looking. Lay down. My vision actually wavered and I had the strongest desire to just lie down on the floor right there and not move.
I finished up and could not make myself go any farther than the couch, so grabbed a blanket and lay down and started working on deep breathing--which like I said, I havent' yet felt any actual problems with my chest or my breathing, but I like to keep doing it just to test and see how everything is in there--and I didn't fall asleep. It wasn't uncomfortable or anything--I just lay there with my eyes closed, breathing deeply and coughing when necessary, but not sleepy. It didn't feel anything like sleepy. I don't think I've ever felt anything like that before in my life. And it wasn't unpleasant or scary, it wasn't panic-inducing, and it was comfortable and about an hour later I drifted off.
Getting up today was the same thing, but slightly different; it was this strong message of stay down, even though I wasn't that sleepy. I slept twice more, then made myself get up and felt normal within five minutes or so, made coffee, drank some water, had some food and Child and I felt sorry for each other, then I gave him Eureka S1E1 and left him to his own devices.
Now, logically speaking, this is normal behavior when one is sick; body fighting infection gets tired fast and etc. There's no fever, no life-ending nausea, no problems breathing; there's a slightly sore throat probably from having to breathe through my mouth, child's ears hurt, we both have a cough, and tiredness and he I think had a very slight fever. But we both are fairly active and I keep us both sitting up as much as possible.
(Um, this is not a plea for symapathy or comfort or whatever; in all honesty, I feel fine, just very tired, and I'm pretty much constnatly testing how deeply I can breathe and checking it against how deeply I normally breathe and I'm not seeing much of a difference. I'm just kind of disturbed, even though I know I shouldn't be. At worst, if this *is* the beginning of that again, it is *way* early and therefore tehy can stop it before it goes beyond this. I just hate this feeling of unpleasant anticipation. Writing it out seems to make it a little less huge and terrifying and inevitable, and right now, my perspective is for shit, so this? Perspective.)