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The Toybox

people for the conservation of limited amounts of indignation

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children of dune - leto 1
seperis: I found smurf porn
seperis: Please hold me.
svmadelyn: weakkkkk.
svmadelyn: come on, i've read the papa smurf getting it on with the evil wizard guy story
seperis: GARGAMEL?
seperis: HE IS--
svmadelyn: yes, that is his name.
svmadelyn: it was more of a double drabble thing
svmadelyn: he spent all that time chasing the smurfs
svmadelyn: because papa smurf was the one who'd gotten away.
seperis: I need therapy now
svmadelyn: I would have thought fandom had broken you of such things ages ago
seperis: You'd think so
seperis: But no.

Hmm. I *could* be writing. But I am googling ALF after reading tantalizing hints of Alf erotic art.

You know, I really feel I am doing something useful for fandom here. We should have a once a month competition to find ways to make us wish we could pour acid in our own eyes rather than know that such a fandom exists.

*thoughtful* Seriously. Alf porn. I want you to all think about this very seriously.

I'm still scarred from the discovery that Dukes of Hazzard slash exists. I don't think I will ever recover.

There there. I can only be shocked there is not more Duke Boys/General Lee (the car). OT3 totally.

Would it even be a competition if I were playing?

I think someone could beat you.

I know where the ALF/cat innuendo is! Oh yes I do! And Muppet porn, too. I am a dirty, dirty girl.

You? You awe me. I totally bow before the master here.

*Why* did I read this?

My Alf (*cries* I didn't know I had an Alf muse . . . I wish I still didn't know . . .) can't decide if he wants to screw (and yes, with the way Alf is built in that area it would *screw*) or eat Miss Piggy and I am refusing to point out that in some circles it's the same thing.


You know, I think Alf secretly prefers Kermit except he really dislikes his skinny legs . . .

I need to go read some good McShep porn 'cause I'm feeling all traumatized now.

wow. Alf/Miss Piggy. A pairing whose time has *come*.

*sympathizes* I think I reached clinical insanity tonight. It's pretty here. There is no logic. Just darkness.

Oh god. At first I thought ALF was an acronym, and I was trying to figure out fandom you were talking about. But then I realized, no. Alf. The puppet, which I found odd, but I was not really surprised. And then I realized that I was not surprised at the idea of Smurf/Gargamel porn either, and... What has fandom done to my brain?

Fandom destroys us all. *nod*

Once a month? Once a week.

I'm worried about everyone's livers during the lightning round. I don't think it can be done without copious amounts of alcohol.

I've already discovered Archie porn and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles porn. I don't know if I could find anything that suprises me anymore.

Fandom is such a beautiful thing. *wipes away a tear of blood*

(Deleted comment)
I'm blaming tonight's nightmares entirely on you. *shudder*


*ponders* How much have I been in fandom where the existance of Alf porn and Smurf porn causes absolutely no suprise.

Of course, I've also read Daffy Duck/Bugs Bunny fic. So really, anything can be porned. *nods*

How about WWF wrestler porn?

Scarred for life!

Considering that there are a ton of male smurfs, but very few female smurfs, iirc, their sex life must be either very kinky het harem sex, or very gay, or both. In any case since there is a baby smurf some sex must have happened at some point... (okay, so officially it's the stork for male smurfs and magic blue earth for female smurfs origins, but still, they kiss at least)

Actually when I was little and collecting smurf figures and reading smurf comics (the tv series came much much later) I already used to wonder about the male/female ratio. Though actually I think the female smurf came years later into the smurf comics.

I mean, originally the smurfs appeared as minor characters in that other comic series Peyo was doing since 1946, Johan et Pirlouit, and in 1958 the smurfs appeared there for the first time in La flûte à six schtroumpfs (um yes, I actually have a special edition zine on the history of the smurf comics and Peyo's biography...) At first there were only male smurfs (who like I mentioned officially are brought by the storks that they also travel on) and the first female smurf was made by the evil Gargamel to sow dissent among the village. I think later the mythology was expanded to allow female smurfs also to be created my magic from special earth or something.

I am dying from your very serious John icon telling me to think seriously about Alf porn. A LOT.

So, last night I found the one where the crew of Firefly had a milkrun (something about dropping a piece of jewelry down a volcano) and needed to set a course for Middle Earth-that-was.

It took me 10 minutes to start breathing normally again.

Whyfore must you vex me so with your ALF and your hideous kinky smurfs???

Lest anyone think I'm making shit up:

Mordor, She Wrote

It's a quick read. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO.

It is obvious you have been sheltered ;)

I still think the Carebear BDSM from Yultide kicks ALF porn ass...

Though I think the Carebears broke my brain because I've had the oddest craving for a Rainbow Bright slash story between the rainbow horse and Onyx (the black machine horse) even since I read it.