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The Toybox

people for the conservation of limited amounts of indignation

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insta!rec - with the lost boys by gelasius, sga
This is pretty much the *epitome* of the story I just *knew* had to come out of The Lost Boys

With the Lost Boys by gelasius - Rodney hopped up on panic and enzyme therapy, the porn track of Ronon and Teyla next door--really, who *didn't* see this coming? Missing, and highly hot--scene from The Lost Boys.

Total post-coital purring. Mmmm.

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Every time I see your cookie icon, I bake cookies. Every time. I am right now struggling mightily to resist the urge.

In short, this icon is a thing of pure evil. Although it is a sweet and chewy, evil, so...

*laughs* I just stuck a batch of chocolate chip in the oven. After clicking on the rec, of course. Hee.

*curious* Are you baking right now?

They are very good pictures of cookies. I keep thinking I'm going ot evnetually have a tempting collection of these.

Mmm. Sweet and chewy evil....

Are you baking right now?

Oh, GOD. I've been in fandom too long. Because the first thing I thought when I read that was, I bet that's a line of dialog from a...no, wait. Better yet. See, Rodney is trapped somewhere in Atlantis, locked into some room that won't let him out, and he's freaking out. John's on the radio, coordinating the rescue efforts, all snapping at Zelenka when he's off mic and then calm again when he's talking to Rodney, trying to keep him from freaking.

And then Rodney's saying, "Oh, oh, oh god. I seriously thought this couldn't get any worse. God, when will I learn that it can always get worse in this galaxy?"

John: Rodney? Rodney. RODNEY. What?

Rodney: The walls, they're closing in, oh my god, it's like in Star Wars, I'm going to be trash compacted, oh my god. Did I ever tell you that scene gave me nightmares for a week? Oh, god.

John: See, okay, the thing is - are you sure?

Rodney, testily: Major, do you have a hearing defect, or is it your brain? Because I am the person *trapped in the shrinking room* - of course I'm sure!

John: It's just, sometimes you panic, and -

Rodney: I'm going to be CRUSHED TO DEATH. I'm ALLOWED TO PANIC. Find me one person who wouldn't panic in this situation, and I will give you a cookie, Sheppard.

John, inspired by the use of "cookie": Actually, no, Rodney. I will give you a cookie. Seriously, calm down, and I will give you a chocolate-chip cookie when we get you out.

Rodney, still very tense: Don't lie to a dying man. You don't have cookies. Everyone ate all their luxury foods before the storm.

John: I had faith in you, Rodney.

Rodney, sounding oddly touched: You did?

John: Yes. Also, I didn't have time to eat certain items in my stash. They require preparation. Because I've always said, there's nothing like a home baked cookie. Hot from the oven, soft, melted chocolate.

Rodney: God, yes.

John: And it's almost better, the part before, when you make them and you can lick the beaters and run your fingers around the bowl for the very last bit of dough -

Rodney: *moans audibly*

John: And then you slide them into the oven, and you can smell them baking, everywhere you go. And you know, you know how good it's going to be, and you can hardly wait, except waiting is part of the pleasure.

Rodney: *moans and gasps* God, yes, don't stop.

John: Then when they're finally, finally ready, and you can just tell - it's like the taste of the air has changed, even - and you open the oven and that hot cloud of sugar-butter-chocolate steam comes out, and it's like it can't get any better -

Rodney: *thunking noise* *more moans*

John: But it does, because you take the first cookie hot from the sheet, and it's almost too hot, but it's exactly what you need, exactly what you've been waiting for -

Rodney: Yes, yes, oh god, John, are you - are you baking right now? God, tell me you're baking now, oh, oh, oh -

John: No, Rodney. I'm waiting for you.

Zelenka: *happy Czech noises* I have it!

Broken Ancient door: *hums, thunks*

John: Door's about to open, Rodney.

Rodney: Now?

John: What, now's not a good time for you for you to be rescued?

Rodney: ...

Zelenka: *mystical door things* *heads into room to retrieve Rodney*

John: *notices that everyone is staring at him*

John: ...What?

Ford: That was, uh, some, um, cookie recipe there, sir.

Teyla: I confess I am not familiar with the concept, and yet...

Elizabeth, dryly: Those had better be some dynamite cookies, Major.

John, looking innocent: I -

Rodney, emerging from depths of Ancient vault thing: Major? You owe me cookies.

John: Yeah, I -

Rodney, grabbing him by the collar and dragging him toward the door: Now. I mean it.

John: *goes, because at this point Rodney's a very fast-moving irresistible force*

Kavanagh, finally snapping shut jaw and checking for drool: I, uh, have to go - get something. In my room.

*general murmurs of agreement*

*everyone departs hastily, except Zelenka, who is still packing up his toolkit, and Miko*

*they exchange wry shrugs*

The End

Well, you certainly captured my attention there!

Nothing beats stumbling across random comment porn.

Um. Wow.


Just. Wow. Yeah. Um.

I need to bake *right now*.

..... I, uh, have to go get something. In the kitchen. *leaves*

OMG, cookie!porn. This is just...I think I need to bake some chocolate-chip cookies right now. Yes.

Hehe. It's amazing how "in my room" translates as "I'll be in my bunk". Cookie porn rules.

okay, i know everyone says this, but seriously, literally, i just SCARED THE CAT with my insane laughter. I think it was the team reactions that killed me most. DYNAMITE COOKIES.

*goes to apologize to the cat*

I had to go make a cookie icon, just so I could comment. I made the cookies, too.

Dammit, I want Shep!cookies, though. Fabulous!!

Rodney: Yes, yes, oh god, John, are you - are you baking right now? God, tell me you're baking now, oh, oh, oh -

John: No, Rodney. I'm waiting for you.

Oh my god.

*melts like a chocolate chip in a 350-degree oven*

I need to bake. Right Now.

Rowr! John sure knows how to talk... cookies. *g*

*drools* :D

OMG! That was awesome! It was funny and hot in a weird Betty Crocker kind of way. And suddenly i have an urge for some, uh, chocolate chip cookies.

Thank you!

Rodney: Yes, yes, oh god, John, are you - are you baking right now? God, tell me you're baking now, oh, oh, oh -

Oh yessssssssss. That was the best!

*tries to catch her breath* Oh god, my stomach hurts. That was so freaking awesome...*now wants Sheppard to come, um, "bake cookies" with her*

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