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The Toybox

people for the conservation of limited amounts of indignation

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children of dune - leto 1
svmadelyn finally sat me down and forced out a deal. I will watch Asylum and Shattered if a.) she sends me cookies and b.) she watches tandem with me online next weekend. Which really means I need to prepare everyone now for my imminent breakdown and fits of crying. Just looking at the discs makes me vaguely queasy. Watching sisabet's vid makes me moreso.

Stupid svmadelyn and her dark manipulations. One day. *shakes fist* One day....

This is where I shake my fist at my computer meaningfully.

Landscape (SV, 65,866 words)

I look at this one and wish to cry. And not in a good, look, end of the world and rain of blood and toads whee! type way either. I'm bent, I get this, and I pretty much blame fandom for it, since when I check out my bookshelf of pre-1999 books, there's a lot of happy there. Not so much with the bunnies and dancing sunshines anymore here. Stupid story.

Still stuck in the happy part. Since last I whined about this, there's been one aborted attempt at sex, one kidnapping, two shootings, one death, and a desperate run to the hospital for emergency surgery while people bleed out on the floor and Lex contemplates mass murder. Yet I still consider this the happy part. Sometimes, I marvel that there are people still willing to speak to me.

*ponder this*.

The Yard (SV, 59,737)

Every time I look at it, I twitch. What was I thinking with using past tense? I backslide so often I have rugburn on my ass. Gah. We left our heros confused and watching the Kryptonian equivlant of television or dealing with Kal. Hmm.

Pretty When You're Mine (SV, 52,894)

The sad thing is, of these three, this one is probably the most cheerful and uplifting.

Frantic (SV, 3,854)

All I need here is a conclusion to the plotline. Maybe two pages, tops. I keep feeling like I should subtitle it "When Goo Attacks".

Shopping therapy would help. It would help *so much*. Like, for sheets. Or books. Or nail polish. Hmm.

Oh, man. You're finally gonna watch them?

Don't rub it in. I'm not joking that those discs are like my Waterloo. I *ran away from the fandom* to avoid watching them. Okay? Just. Gah. I am so going to need alcohol or something.

*eyes discs warily*

OMG FINISH FRANTIC! Plus, you promised me smut and I am *holding* you to that.

You never saw Asylum and Shattered? Leaving out Lex part, I could watch the scene with Lana and the horse over and over and over again.

*giggles* How comforting.

There's a few WiPs left off that list there. ;p

*raises eyebrows* Such as?

Those two episodes are brilliant--two of the best of the series. But very painful. At least you'll get to watch them together and not be left hanging for weeks (during Christmas, no less) like those of us who watched it on tv were. I still remember gasping, "Oh my GOD!" at the end of Shattered. And I haven't been able to watch it again since, even though I have the dvd set.

Mmm. Intense pain ALLATONCE. I am so not going to recover easily.

I could always *lose* them....


WORD. I watched an entire disc of S3 today and just had to skip Asylum. *whimper*

This is so not comforting.


I understand your hesitation about Asylum/Shattered- it's a love hate thing for me. I think it's 2 of the best SV episodes though. And I'm wowed that you can write such great fics without having seen Asylum/Shattered. They're important episodes to the Lex/Clark relationship.... I hope you post your thoughts on them :) Good luck with the viewing! And I'm so glad you're still continuing those fics!

*sniffles* It's gonna hurrrrttttt....

God -- I couldn't EVEN make myself write last night. So depressing, especially after having made you drunken (er, yeah, I was a little tipsy when I im'd you) promises Friday night about updating. Not that you asked, but I foolishly volunteered thinking that would force me to do it. If I thought writing rape difficult, writing Lex pov aftermath feels even worse. The weather's just too pretty for that level of angst (she said, making excuses).

Maybe sometime this week. Surely school will make me a.)pissed enough or b.)depressed enough to knock this out. We'll see.


S'okay sweetie. *hugs* Don't worry. It'll happen. You'll be fine. Lex won't be. *grins* But you will.

*giggles and hugs*

I dare you to finish the rest of that "One day" sentence.

*eyes you*

This is all for the best. You'll see.

Like amputation?

*hides discs from self, hopes to forget where they are by Saturday*

(Deleted comment)
And...ooh...in Shattered Lex wears Clark's shirt, which is one of my Top Five Fannish Kinks. So...concentrate on that! That and Stompy.

Oh dear heaven. really?

*warily more hopeful*

I will watch Asylum and Shattered

Are you sure you want to do that? Those are the eps that made me quit watching the show. I couldn't even read clex for quite a while after that.

Not at all. *shivers*

But otoh, I need first-hand viewing of some Shattered and Asylum anyway for a fic, so---

God, this is going to hurt.

Hi, Jenn! I'm Tess. (Big Fan!)

I'm de-lurking to tell you that at this point you've probably built up the whole Shattered/Asylum arc in your head SO MUCH that it can't possibly be as bad you think it is. Besides, don't you already know what happens?

And once you see them, if you don't want to, you don't ever have to see them again.

You know, that's proably true. I will probalby be like, "I was scared of that????" Oh man, I hope so.

*hugs* Hi!

Good luck with Shattered/Asylum. I bawled for about an hour after Shattered. And was so upset from Asylum, that I actually threw up. I haven't watched it again since. But I can still watch Shattered, as long as I skip the end.


Okay, I am going to need alcohol for this, aren't I?

Er... Not to add to the cache of unencouraging comments, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to -- those two eps kind of turned me off Smallville.

But then again, there are episodes of Buffy I can never bring myself to watch either -- I'll watch the lead-in and the aftermath, but "Surprise" and "Innocence" and, dear God, "Becoming" I usually leave well enough alone. I prefer to skip around the overwhelming angst.

... I suspect someday I'll watch them and go, "Oh... That's all?" I've got to echo countess7 and mention that probably you're remembering them as worse than they are. Maybe. Hopefully.

::cough:: Okay, done now.

But then again, there are episodes of Buffy I can never bring myself to watch either -- I'll watch the lead-in and the aftermath, but "Surprise" and "Innocence" and, dear God, "Becoming" I usually leave well enough alone. I prefer to skip around the overwhelming angst.

I can't rewatch season two--I still have put off getting the DVDs. Jenny's death, the turn of Angel--that entire thing just--gah. I remember that.

Painful Ep Support

I would happily send you alcohol if I could. And if you need more fangirls for group crying and support I'm there. I'll bring virtual alcohol and extra soft kleenex.

You are a brave woman watching those eps. *pets*

Re: Painful Ep Support

*hugs despeartely*

When you see incoherent wailing on my LJ on Sat or Sun, you will know.

*bites lip*

Re: Asylum/Shattered

You poor, poor woman.

I don't even know you and I want to send you comfort alcohol.

Re: Asylum/Shattered

Thank you. Yes. Alcohol would be very good. Perhaps for two days leading up.

I can do this. I so can do this.