April 23rd, 2008

children of dune - leto 1

oh john ringo no!

If that subject line does not take over the livejournals, there is no justice in the universe.

books to make my flist's heads explode: John Ringo by hradzka - what I need here is a new language to express my feelings.

Let me illustrate: last night, I had to stop reading every few paragraphs, because I was laughing so hard I was crying and unable to see the screen. At eleven at night, my son comes to my bedroom door with a dark look. I wiped my eyes shakily and hid the words Also, to take care of the trainers' needs, he brings in whores. LOOK, I TOLD YOU. HE ADOPTS THEM. LIKE CATS. while he peered at me hatefully from under dark blond bangs and said, "You woke me up."

I said, "I--" And continued to laugh. On the way out, he pointedly closed the door behind him. Let me just say, I will be suffering for that when I send him to bed tonight. It is so totally worth it.

From the author's review:

Yes, you will be horrified by a lot of this, because Mike Harmon's adventures are by turns awesomely horrific and horrifically awesome; I freely confess that I cannot stop reading these books, because *I have to see what Ringo does next.* I do, however, have a finely-tuned defense mechanism: whenever something trips my circuit breaker, causing me to cringe away from the page, I utter aloud a cry that resets my noggin. You will probably need it yourself, so I provide it here, as a public service: "OH JOHN RINGO NO."

This is 7695 words (yes, I word counted this after) of a book review that smashes all other book reviews. You are on top of the glass here people. You will feel feelings you never knew you had. You will re-read several paragraphs several times to make sure what you read is, indeed, what you read. Even though I will tell you now--yes. The first time, you read it right. You really did. But go ahead and do it again.

Awesome. Really freaking disturbing. As the reviewer states, this is Lord King Bad Vid of the novel world. I only suggest when you read, make sure it's nowhere you can hit your head when you sit up abruptly (eighty or so times) yelling those four words.

Oh John Ringo, no!
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children of dune - leto 1

this day doesn't rhyme

To do a final roundup of the Boob Idiocy, because as of now, I will use the words open source in relation to this over my dead body (and breasts), Unfunny Business at Journalfen has a really good roundup of a variety of the links.

Separately, Scalzi's blog has an interesting commentary (a year ago, I didn't even recognize his name; now I can pick his name out of a line-up and quote lines from his blog. I find this funny on a variety of levels) here.

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ETA: Also adding The Right of Making Available by rivkat, which hands down is one of my favorite responses yet.
children of dune - leto 1

one more link of awesome

Okay, one final link, since it won't show up on metafandom yet:

I Want A Great Big Stick And A Large Can of Whoop-Ass by emrinalexander totally brings it.


"I don't get it," you say, scratching your heads. See, I wish I could feel sorry for you not getting it, but see? Life is inherently unfair and part of that unfairness is that I don't freaking care if you actually understand all the whys and wherefores. Not one damn bit do I care. I don't understand why most men can look like the back of bus, be toothless, and only have one leg, and yet they still think if they hit on the 20 year old blonde girl she's going to maybe give them a go. See? Life is unfair, get over it.

And this is why I love her. A lot.

ETA: (I thought I'd linked this)

Open Source Women Back Each Other Up Project by vito_excalibur

I would like to start the Open Source Women Back Each Other Up Program. Here's my pledge: if I see somebody groping you in public, and you're not moaning Yes! Yes! Yes!, I will break through your Somebody Else's Problem invisibility field and come over and ask if you're okay. If your situation looks dangerous enough I can't help on my own, I will call over friends or, if it's a situation in which I think the cops would be on your side, I will call the cops. If you're being harassed by a guy, you can say so to me, even if you don't know me. I pledge I will distract him so you can get away, or I will tell him that he needs to leave, or whatever I can do to the best of my ability. I pledge that yes, actually, because you are a woman I will give you the benefit of the doubt. If you tell me that a guy just did something shitty to you I will not refuse to look at any evidence and tell you that I know him and he's a great guy and you must have been imagining things. I have great loyalty to my male friends but I will not allow that to blind me to the fact that none of us are saints and even my best friends can screw up and may need to be called on it. I pledge that I will walk you to your car if you don't feel safe walking alone at night, and then you can drive me to mine.

Yes. This. Right here. I'm in. Yes.