November 21st, 2004

children of dune - leto 1

(no subject)

I'm trying to think positive.

*sighs* Screw that. I'm trying to think *sane*.

I'm scared to go back to my office. I'm scared. Not just dreading, but I'm *scared*. I'm not afraid of having too much work, I'm not really afraid of the misery my super can cause, though that's Hugely a Problem, 'cause if anyone knows how to hide, it's me. I'm not even really that freaked about being without friends in the office, since I know Missy's going to find another job soon. Though that sucks, since it occurs to me that I've gotten used to a certain amount of friendly human interaction. You know, the kind that doesn't involve a computer. It's that I know I can't succeed at this. And eventually, I'm going to stop even trying.

On More Happy Notes

Landscape is officially beyond the halfway point. I look on it with a great deal of pride. No post-finishing-one-half-letdown for *me*, oh no. I sent that sucker off to issaro and svmadelyn, curled up in a happy ball on my chair, and thought, I am *so cool*. And also, I can take a nap now.

You cannot underestimate the power of a nap as incentive. A *mid-day* nap, even.


Speaking of those.

I was thinking on the myriad ways I am disobeying every parenting book ever written and smiling to myself.

Okay, thing. Last year, Child sucked in school. Frankly, it's a constant surprise to me he passed. He hated it. He was bullied to the point he was throwing up. I have a bad feeling his teacher didn't pay much attention to him. He was deeply unhappy. His handwriting was terrible. His reading was terrible. All in all, first grade was not a good year for him.

After his first two weeks in second grade, where he seemed to be *excited* to go to school, I sat down with him and cut a deal. Because I am that kind of a parent.

The Very Wrong Reward System:

Perfect A's--any Game Cube game he wants, with a rating of below M.
Perfect A's and B's--any Game Cube game he wants below thirty dollars, same rule on rating.

The only reason I put the M in place is that some of them are, frankly, scary as shit. I'm less worried about the violence than I am the animation. It scares *me*.

First report card? He made merit roll, easy, all A's and B's. Well, not easy--his handwriting is atrocious and went one point over the minimum for a B, but he got a 97 in science, which completely blows my mind, and during conference, his teacher said that he was understanding the work at levels most of the other students didn't. Buttering up the parent is, I'm sure, a common thing, but I'm all for that. We sat down and talked about how much better he's doing, then I took him to buy his game, Spiderman.

So, this six weeks.

Still perfect A's and B's. Except we're up to five A's and two B's, his handwriting improved by three points, and his reading jumped by *eight*, math by three.

What have I learned from this? The Reward System WORKS.

So, we renegotiated, since that was a hell of a jump. Perfect A's on the next report card nets him a Playstation 2. Everything stays the same with B's.

So. I'm just a rebel on the loose these days.

Other Weirdness

Okay, this is probably just me. But does anyone ever just sitting around, suddenly thinking up originalish slash ideas? Which technically wouldnt' be called slash. I know, it's silly, and the premise that I worked out while, you know, wasting time is just ridiculous, but there it is.

*sighs* I need to do something productive. Porn would be good.

You know what else woudl be good, svmadelyn? More Devil!Lex. Perhaps we should all, you know, as a group, email her? Lots of email. Perhaps *flood* her with email to remind her she left us hanging.

I like to call it *encouragement*.