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The Toybox

people for the conservation of limited amounts of indignation


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review: QaF, season four, episode seven
children of dune - leto 1
seperis
Being pretty much in love with Brian gives me absolutely no objectivity. I'm so good with that. No, really.

Other people say smart things. I'm going to wander. 'Cause man, angst. Sometimes boring angst. Very, very boring angst.

I feel snarky. Just chalk it up to hormones or something.



In Order of Conversation

Jenn: Brian is so hot
Jenn: I'mwatching now.
burnitbackwards: i know. he really is.
Jenn: Let me just say again. My God.
burnitbackwards: i have said many times.
burnitbackwards: that gale gets hotter every year.
burnitbackwards: EVERY WEEK, EVEN.

This is my top thing of liking. Somehow, Brian manages to look hot doing everything. He makes getting high hot, he makes getting drunk hot, he makes tricking emotionlessly hot, and he makes angst, like, orgasmic. It really blows my mind.

From the first moment we saw him, hot. Just hot. His snark was noticeably off in the office, though I'm glad to see him making an effort to be difficult. He's a natural ass, and it pains me to see him have to work so hard at it. You know things are going south when Brian can't quite get out the biting sarcasm.

Funeral. My God, the hotness. But no gloves, which for some reason bothered me. A lot. I'm not sure if there was some weird symbology going on there, because Brian and his gloves are Happy Things. I could have lived a long time without seeing him studying the casket like he was wondering how much it would cost. Seriously here, he was giving it the kind of once over he does potential tricks. *sighs* Oh Brian.

Brian's First Foreshadowing Clue: Going to Ibiza and disappearing. Foreshadowing is like, falling everywhere. Like snowflakes, even.

Jenn: Oh wonderful. Group therapy.
Jenn: Oh. So. Boring.
Jenn: See? This is time that could be used for sex.
Jenn: Yet is it? No.
burnitbackwards: I KNOW.
Jenn: Aww Blake is angsting. And a funeral. Yet another lost opportunity for sex.
burnitbackwards: oh believe me. there are many, many lost opportunities for sex in this ep.

Okay, don't get me wrong here. I'm all for the sympathy thing, and the pain thing, the guilt-for-Blake-thing--but any of this time above? We totally could have fit a blowjob in there somewhere. I'm just saying. I miss the sex per ep a lot. I miss the gratuitous nudity.

My God, this show is taking itself seriously, isn't it? We have Blake, belatedly realizing his responsibilities, and Brian, contemplating death by testicles, and me, thinking, you writers are slowly killing all hope in me that anyone here will ever have sex again. I mean, anyone I want to see have sex.

I can be shallow like that.

Jenn: Yes, Hunter, you are such a rebel, unzipping so aggressively.
Jenn: ACK Ben is EVOL! HE IS WEARING BROWN!
Jenn: That is his color, yes, but still.
burnitbackwards: i love hunter.
burnitbackwards: and ben is hot in this ep, disturbingly.
Jenn: EVIL BEN!
Jenn: Justin looks better.
Jenn: Thank you God.
Jenn: These people are BORING.
Jenn: I can see why Brian is debating death.
Jenn: Why wasn't Blake at the funeral with ted?
burnitbackwards: BECAUSE SEX TRAUMA.

*sighs* I really can't say it better than that.

Jenn: ACK! THEY ARE CUDDLING! COVER MY EYES!@

Or that.

Jenn: *ACK*
Jenn: SEX TALK! NO NO NO!
burnitbackwards: I KNOW.
burnitbackwards: SO DISGUSTING. I TOLD YOU SO.

Or really, that.

*shudders* I'm going to be flashbacking to this for years, aren't I?

Jenn: Oh Ben, you evil person you.
Jenn: Oh Mr. I Am An Expert on Everything!

*bounces* Gratuitous, senseless Ben abuse! I can put it in anywhere! Unfortunately, Ben did nothing to arouse my ire. Bastard. You can see by this very fact that he is evil and deliberately annoying me with his general niceness. Bah.

Jenn: Bah
burnitbackwards: ben = sweetiepants. *pets*
Jenn: Hee! Michael's getting high!

I really think that saves that entire scene. I feel bad for Michael. I really do. He's feeling mortality by proxy. And to think he doesn't even know yet that it's going to get so much worse.

Jenn: Justin and sex talk...
Jenn: *ponders*
Jenn: See, I'm not sure if it's hot in itself, because Brian makes everything hot.
Jenn: Brian refusing sex is a sign of the apocalypse.
burnitbackwards: but justin has his mouth full!!!!! so gross.

This is true and disturbing. That might have been the worst sex talk in history, and I have no clue. Perhaps, one might even think, something they read in a fanfic. A bad one. The sad thing is, I have no objectivity. This is all the sex I get out of them this episode, so whee!

Yes. That's it. Justin talking his way through non-sex, and then Brian completely terrifies me by--*yawning* and says he's tired. This is pretty much, to me, a sign of the apocalypse, end of days, and proof of the existence of evil. I'm only surprised Justin didn't make a run for some holy water of some kind, or a priest to exorcise him, or something. It's not like they don't know a priest.

Jenn: Emmett wakes up weird.

Yes, what was up with that arm going out like a pointer puppy or something?

Jenn: These people are boring. Except Brian.
Jenn: Brian is fun.
burnitbackwards: i know. brian is the best :x
Jenn: I love him.

You see here that I am pretty much given up and gone into a nice fantasy where it's All Brian, All the Time.

Jenn: ACCKKKK! TED AND BLAKE!!! NOOOOOOO!
burnitbackwards: yes. how can you not love someone who is so achingly gorgeous :-))

I swear, she's talking about Brian, not Blake or Ted.

Jenn: Awww. Ted scared me with something about piggies.

I didn't hear the whole thing, and did not rewind, because honestly, I do not want to know. At all. Ever.

Jenn: Blake wants to break up.
burnitbackwards: blake is all *TRAUMATIZED*
Jenn: Blake needs to get back on drugs.
Jenn: That would help everything.
Jenn: Everyone was happier high and fucking.

It's like a revelation, man.

Jenn: ...there are deer in the hall.
Jenn: Debbie has gone crazy. In a very boring way.
Jenn: 310 days until Christmas. Okay, so what date does this make it?
burnitbackwards: quinn says feb 16/17.
Jenn: Feb 20, it looks like. I think.

A genuine Christmas miracle. Seriously. Can anyone reconcile canon to this in a vague way? A timeline? Anything? Seriously, I've got to see it.

Jenn: Brian and Gus! THE CUTE! OMG!
Jenn: *sighs* Brian is so pretty.
Jenn: *sighs dreamily*
burnitbackwards: i know. gus <33333
Jenn: Yes. Teletubbies are evil.
Jenn: Brian is dropping clues everywhere.

He really is. He isn't yelling *I HAVE SOME KIND OF DISEASE TYPE THING!* but that's just by accident.

Jenn: Ooh! Ted at Babylon. This. Just. Got. Interesting!
Jenn: It's wrong. I like Ted high.
burnitbackwards: no it didn't get interesting, believe me.
burnitbackwards: it gets real boring again. real quick.
Jenn: Hmm. in this strange alterate universe, Ted is hot.

This is worrisome, and also, makes my earlier point. Yes, yes, yes, Ted was high and stealing money and being a scary wreck, and yes, that gangbang thing happened, but still, he didn't angst this much. And he got laid a lot. People hit on him. *shakes head*

Jenn: Hee! Justin worries about his hair.
Jenn: Hee! Practically nothing and no one they haven't done.

I love that line. I just do. Also, Justin worrying that he's gotten too old for Brian. That's just funny.

Jenn: ...I can already tell this is going to hurt.
burnitbackwards: SCOTT is hot. TED is stupid.
Jenn: Justin is the best boyfriend ever.
burnitbackwards: isn't he? and so cute.
burnitbackwards: SO CUTE.

Again, the clue bus passeth by. See, this is the problem with being a viewer--we all know Brian has Issues and therefore, can see that this is a really creepy and rather terrifying cry for help. Justin brings home *two* tricks--one arguably dumb one "You're right, he is hot"--where the hell has he been for the last few years in Pittsburgh? UNDER A ROCK? THAT IS BRIAN KINNEY! *rolls eyes* He sure as hell have better had a really amazing cock.

Justin really is the best boyfriend ever. Seriously. He picks up some pretty tricks, brings them home, gets them all naked for his boyfriend, and bam. Brian just does this really strange, classy, *strange* version of running--I have to get something from the *office*? What. The. Hell?

He's just lucky Justin hasn't checked him into a mental hospital yet.

Jenn: I feel bad for Michael.
Jenn: His husband and kid have death sentences, and soon, Brian.
Jenn: Awww. Emmett!
Jenn: Ted! And Emmett!
Jenn: ..and Emmett is talking up Blake.
Jenn: I am so disturbed.
Jenn: Mm. Brian and Michael getting high together,
burnitbackwards: you are making me giggle :-))
Jenn: It amazes me that everyone is saying exactly the wrong thing to Brian
Jenn: I mean, every time, spot on.

It's like meant to be. So far, if you make a statement to Brian, it is guaranteed to be the one that supports some kind of passive suicide. Amazing how that works out.

Jenn: Wow, Brian,you are a cheerful ray of sunlight.
Jenn: yes, keep up that cheer.

This period of time is what I like to call "mallets hitting everyone over the head, in case you weren't aware, Brian is making a Huge Decision here."

Jenn: Aww! Cuddling!
Jenn: Does Brian have something against furniture these days?
Jenn: Is this some kind of weird rebellion?

Anyone have an answer to that one? 'Cause really, he can afford furniture, right?

Jenn: If I were parnoid, I'd be worried about the Brian and Michael vibes

I still am. If I were paranoid, I would still be, I mean.

Brian being so non-tactile was more than a little disturbing, but he's being like that with everyone. Not with Justin so much, but his little personal space bubble is getting mighty visible. wrenlet I think, commented first on it, but watching it again, there's the same sense of--something. I am Uncleanness? Not entirely sure. Very not Brian. He speaks best with his body. He pretty much depends on it to get the message across when he can't. And as a rule, his body gives away anything he's feeling. From that moment at the floor picnic--oh the cuteness!!!!!--he's been physically withdrawing as fast as he can. Michael's too lost in his own pain to pick that up. Justin's been feeling this for a couple of days. Makes me wonder how they're sleeping at night, actually. Brian all curled up, burrito-like, in the blankets, trying in really bizarre ways to keep contact to a minimum? Freaking Justin out more? Very likely.

Same thing when he's yelling at Justin in the office. It's interesting how he does try and keep space--a desk, his voice, pretty much anything to keep Justin *back*. Hugging Justin was probably the hardest thing he's done in this ep. It hurt to watch. And if Justin isn't quietly looking back at that throwaway comment about Ibiza at the funeral and beginning to wonder....

I didn't break down watching Brian go into surgery, but the utterly controlled panic as Brian counted backwards hurt to watch.

*breathes*

Randomly Commenting

For some reason, settling down three of the main characters with something resembling long term partners has been a sign that everyone must immediately become domestic, boring, and grumpy over every little thing. And also, never, ever have sex again. I mean, ever.

On the other hand, I had fun watching. Blake and Ted or Ted and Emmett? I'm acutally sort of passively torn. Emmett spent a lot of time looking very hot. Debbie is really close to a nervous breakdown, and I want to give her some valium so much. Hunter is still cute. And he and Michael just work for me so much, and that really surprises me. They shouldn't, but they do, less parental maybe, but something that it feels like Hunter needs. Ben can be the intellectual who is doing the parenting, father knows best, whatever, but Michael's connecting with Hunter in a very emotional, personal way. I'm explaining this so badly, but I love scenes with just them together. Sometimes, I kind of wonder if this is how Brian was able to become so close to Michael.

Michael makes me happy.


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Jenn: Debbie has gone crazy. In a very boring way.

Bwa-hahaha! This totally sums up this episode for me. *g*

It's creepy, and not in a fun way, like Brian can do it. *sighs* But yes. And everyone going along with it was--um. Inspired? *skeptical*

I feel like things might be going downhill from here. I should start biting my nails in advance of the fact.

(Deleted comment)
OMG WE SO ARE!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111!


yes, yes. you're brilliant. now get on ym, bitch. i need help.

This is the first review I've read of this episode (and S4 in general) that I've completely agreed with.

Brian is hot.

Justin is cute.

Not enough (B/J) sex.

S4 is boring.

Brian is hot. That saves *everything*. I mean, I could turn off the sound adn watch him angst and be content.

*sighs dreamily*

And yes, what the hell is *up* with the hot people not having sex?

*grr*

Am I like the *only* one who found Justin-chewing-on-fortune-cookie-while-seducing-Brian adorably sweet and kinda hot? *crickets chirp*
Guess so.
And you are so right - CowLip WHERE'S THE GODDAMN PR0N???!!!!! You think we became addicted to this show for the STORYLINES??!! Puh-lease. /end shallow rant
But seriously, need more nekkid Gale and Randy, right the fuck now. Miracle healing sex mebbe? With Randy driving this time?? *passes out*
Enjoyed this. :)

I thought it was hot too. I was like, "JUSTIN HAS FOOD IN MOUTH THIS IS MAKING ME SWEAT"

Then I was all, "JUSTIN HAS FOOD IN MOUTH AND SAID 'DICK', THIS IS MAKING ME SWEAT MORE"

Clearly, I need to eat more Chinese food.

*g* It was cute. I'm just bitter at the sheer lack of sex going on these days. No wonder everyone is so grumpy all the time.

And you are so right - CowLip WHERE'S THE GODDAMN PR0N???!!!!! You think we became addicted to this show for the STORYLINES??!! Puh-lease. /end shallow rant
But seriously, need more nekkid Gale and Randy, right the fuck now. Miracle healing sex mebbe? With Randy driving this time?? *passes out*
Enjoyed this. :)


If God is kind.

I'm kind of hanging on the idea of sweet post-cancer healing sex at this point. Something long and soundtracked with lots and lots of nudity.

Jenn: 310 days until Christmas. Okay, so what date does this make it?
burnitbackwards: quinn says feb 16/17.
Jenn: Feb 20, it looks like. I think.


I'm pretty sure it's the 16th or 17th-

365 days - 7, makes Christmas the 358th day of the year. 358-310=48, that's the 48th day of the year.
January has 31 days. 48-31=17.

You guys are too funny. I watch all by myself (well, except for the cat) and keep trying to get the FF button to work when Ted is onscreen.

366 days, it's a leap year, so maybe 17 or 18?

I badly want to have the patience to sit down with my calendar and just go through it inch by inch. *sighs* Just so we *know*.

*G*

You guys are too funny. I watch all by myself (well, except for the cat) and keep trying to get the FF button to work when Ted is onscreen.

*laughs* We should all do group AIM/YM watching or something.

so maybe 17 or 18?

And of course, we have to take into account Christmas day itself. Was Emmett counting it or not? lol. Obsess much? Me? not at all.

We should all do group AIM/YM watching or something.

That would be a blast. Of course my sole contribution would be along the lines of, "OMG", "OMG", "Oh fast forward please, these people are dull!", "ohohoh", and "Brian looks amazingly hot." So y'know, maybe you don't want to invite me. lol.


*waves* Hiiiii!

Michael is adorable ^_^

So is Justin.

Brian is THE SHIT. (like, the good one. ie Bring It On)

^____^

*happy place*'

Yeessss.

I never thought I'd like Michael. Yet I do. He and Hunter? Aww the cuteness.

That might have been the worst sex talk in history, and I have no clue. Perhaps, one might even think, something they read in a fanfic. A bad one. The sad thing is, I have no objectivity. This is all the sex I get out of them this episode, so whee!

Uh huh. Right there with you. It was just so cute until it wasn't. Gah. Justin never gets lucky with loft picnics.

Hunter was cute and funny and angsty and Gale so knows how to bring on the pain. And Michael was great to watch with both of them. Really it was a very good episode aside from the Deb insanity. But there's a spark missing this season, and not just because of the B/J sex deficit. Coming of age. Bleh. Who the hell needs that anyway?

Hunter was cute and funny and angsty and Gale so knows how to bring on the pain. And Michael was great to watch with both of them. Really it was a very good episode aside from the Deb insanity. But there's a spark missing this season, and not just because of the B/J sex deficit. Coming of age. Bleh. Who the hell needs that anyway?

I want teh immature, angst porn, dammit. *sighs* Sweet post-cancer healing sex. *crosses fingers* Please please please.

So many things I want to quote back to you, but I'll save the time and instead, give you a list:

Brian is hot, no matter what he is doing.
Blake makes me want to put sharp things in my eyes and Ted trying to talk dirty makes me want to put blunt things in my eyes with lots of force.
The counting backwards thing killed me dead. Three times even.
And I am fully supporting Ted and Emmett getting back together, even if it is a bad idea. Just cos. Then I can handle Ted.

Brian is hot, no matter what he is doing.

He makes breathing the sexiest thing ever. How does he *do* that?

*amazed*

Blake makes me want to put sharp things in my eyes and Ted trying to talk dirty makes me want to put blunt things in my eyes with lots of force.

I am so with you there. Just. No. No no no.

The counting backwards thing killed me dead. Three times even.

*whimpering*

And I am fully supporting Ted and Emmett getting back together, even if it is a bad idea. Just cos. Then I can handle Ted.

I'm just so torn. He and Blake, when not traumatizing me with their sex talk and sex life, are *cute*. But Emmett...

Damn. Oh so torn.

He makes breathing the sexiest thing ever. How does he *do* that?

I don't know, but dude . . . yeah.


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