Seperis (seperis) wrote,

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so many drugs

So I was supposd to start those antibiotics like, three weeks ago. Now, legit, I had to wait for the first of April to pick them up as money+time was a problem. is now the fifteenth.

That's not true, exactly; I do know--medication apparently scares me except methylphenidate and levothyroxide (thyroid) and--improvement!--my nasal sprays. No reason, though, and no real pattern other than my ability to make my brain (sometimes) stop this shit.

This has been a thing since the August 2017 Anxiety Thing, or rather, about two weeks after that when things got weird. I am wary of ibuprofen, for fuck's sake, and nyquil, and basically if it exists. I know the logic chain as it exists now, but--I don't know exactly how it started, though my best guess is back in 2008, when I was hospitalized (For the second time) with pneumonia and the antibiotics they gave me induced what I still refer to as Life Ending Nausea, like, worse than morning sickness (and mine sucked). I've been reasonably wary since then, but the outright avoidance/fear, that part's about two years and change.

Granted, it does not help that they're fucking horsepills: Amox-Clav 875 MG twice a day with a warning to take a probiotic for gut flora reasons we shall smooth over now because eww. For twenty one days. After that, the steroids. Then I go back for a CAT scan of my nose and to see if anything else needs to be done. The reason for the helldrugs is that all signs point to a severe long-term sinus infection and pretty much the only way to get rid of it is to nuke it to the ground.

I have to start dammit. They're antibiotics. It'll be fine. But if anyone has any advice on how to take them and with what to reduce nausea and horror, please feel free to share.

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Tags: mental illness
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