Forty-one separate skin tests--including rabbit--have yielded the following: I may be a little tiny bit allergic to walnuts and German cockroaches. Everything else was statistically insignificant and I have pictures of my back to prove it. Or, those things could be contributory maybe? but not really. I don't even like walnuts so not a problem there.
I have a mildly deviated septum which no one in my entire life of doctors looking up my nose has noticed before and needs special equipment to explore (my nostril. To explore my nostril). I had mentioned earlier in the appointment that my upper gums got swollen or tender or really sensitive on occasion as well as the roof of my mouth and I still had problems smelling things sometimes or I smell the wrong things, sometimes unpleasant. Her expression should have warned me but whatever.
So working theory: I have had a chronic sinus infection most of my life, which apparently is true of forty-nine percent of the population who comes in for allergy tests, specifically one that reacts badly to changes in barometric pressure, humidity, temperature aka weather changes and becomes irritated and inflamed and worse and contributory to my misery. There is no season for this; it's all the seasons.
...yes. I am allergic to weather. To weather. That's a thing.
(Like, won't lie, a part of me was like "YES I KNEW IT WOULD BE SOMETHING STUPID AND WEIRD AND WHAT" but...I was joking about being allergic to the weather. I didn't know it was a thing. But it is a thing.)
Now why on earth insert concept here: no idea. I've had diagnosed sinus infections before, so that part is at least there, but the rest, no fucking clue. She added an antihistamine to the flonase for daily use that I need to take at an angle because the taste is horrific if it gets to the back of my throat. I also have an appointment with an ENT in March to do deep nostril exploration--nostril exploration--and also need to acquire and learn to use a neti pot???? and ponder universal irony.
Like, I have no idea where this goes but you'd think someone, somewhere would have said "Gosh, that's one deviated septum I wonder if shit is getting up there and infecting????" Like, any time since fourth grade?
Okay, but. Why do antihistamines work? Why does hay make me sneeze? What is the sound of one hand clapping? We just don't know.
Update: I am making two quarts of tea, three parts Yorkshire Red/one part Lady Grey to deal with my life. Extra sweet: I deserve it. Recommended for existential nasal complaints and need of high-calibre caffeine.
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