what. the. fuck.
I am honestly bereft of any coherent words for this one.
Okay, so pru and cj are no help here. Thank you ladies. *blinking* Like being hit with a two by four.
I'm going to say something I have never said about any episode in the history of SV, barring only Prodigal becaues well, Lucas.
This was fucking unbelievable and besides the fact I can't, well, function, I just.
Okay, trying again.
First off, we have Destiny, whispering evilly in Clark's ear, and you know, don't you think Jor-El and Lionel must, on some metaphysical, deeply spiritual plane between here and the afterworld (I like to call it hell), are like, soul brothers. This makes so much sense.
I'm also betting that Jor-El had really great hair.
Right. I'm babbling. Jesus.
So, evil whispering voice in Clark's head, downloaded from the cave, and imagine that, I was wondering what other little goodies that thing might have downloaded into SuperDork when he suddenly decided playing with ancestral alien technology was a great idea. You know, because me? When I find werid stuff I can't explain? I always give it a test drive.
Clever, Clark. But you know, hoenstly, don't blame you.
This isn't a recap. This is babbling.
Clark and Lana -- dear God, they made me like it. Puppy love is adorable and they make me want to write CLana, if it was, well, vaguely possible at this point. Clark looked HAPPY. Of course, like Lex, Clark was never meant to be happy without the pain, which does raise the question of this pattern continuing through his adulthood. All that sweetness just WAITING to curdle, and you know, screw my romantic vibes, there is nothing better than watching thta and knowing the doom is coming up like a big, doomy thing.
See? It even screwed up my metaphors!
So, Clark does his Just Say No speech, but what do you know, Lionel-El--oh, sorry, I mean Jor-El--wasn't interested. Big, big weridness and light show, then Clark gets branded, and no, I'm not smiling hugely at all here. Not me. And with an S you say? Imagine that. Actually, a figure eight, but my imagination removes half of it, and did he not spend an inordinate amount of time walking around with his shirt unbuttoned? Was I SUPPOSED to concnetrate on the angst with THAT there? I mean, I still COULD, but damn did they make it difficult.
Lex and Helen--Lex tells the truth, which was so out of character yet strangely in character that it made me think. If this was any other show, I'd assume Lex spent the night thinking about the error of his ways. I'm considering the idea that he weighed his emotional investment, how long it would take him to find someone of equal or greater worth, and her knowledge of the Kents, against that vial of blood. Makes me wonder. Because end of last ep? I wasn't seeing great grief.
And oddly, I dind't see it when she came back, either. For comparison, remember every time Clark ever griped Lex down, and Lex's almost desperate reaction to it? Yes, it hurts, but think back. Jitters. Leech. Even Ryan to a lesser extent. Keep going. You see it? I do.
Lionel and Helen talking, makes me nervous. Helen's smiles made me nervous. Everything ABOUT her made me nervous, and I didn't like the fact she came back. And said the wedding was on. That just--wrong.
Wedding. Clark not there, of course, mooning about that key. Jonathan, in an act of fatherly love that has reconciled me to his existence, gives Lex the Kent Family Compass, and okay, brought tears to my eyes. Aww!
Okay, why stay here when I can focus on the freaky, though? MOving on.
Clark defies destiny. Oh what a shock. Jor-El threatens. Huh, again, seeing the Lionel parallels. Clark, in a fit of desperation, commits proxy parricide and also manages to injure his folks and causing Martha's miscarriage. Yes, I think half of fandom saw that one coming.
So. All this leads up to the Three Big Moments--Clark, in a fit of teenage angst, decides that hsi best bet to--spare his family and friends is to--go evil. Hmmm. *pets Clark* Poor woobie.
Lex and Helen take off in the LexCorp jet. HElen keeps looking odd. Very, very odd. But subtly odd. LEx goes to sleep, apparetnly, but he wakes up oddly woozy. That's never a good sign. The plane is doing weird things. Huh. Where's Helen, Lex thinks, wandering around. And oddly, he can't find her, until he opens up the cockpit, where a ruined console nad the ocean meet hsi eyes, and oh wow.
I didn't say that, but I squeed so loud.
Chloe and Lionel have tea. Chloe offeres up Clark on a pretty journalistic platter. It's scarily cute and disturbing, and Chloe looks very, very grown-up and very, very hot. I'm just saying. Wow. And the chemistry was good.
Don't read past this if you really aren't into speculation:
Murder of Lex, Take 1:
Helen, for some reason, has been in league with Lionel from the beginning, and this is a seriously long, drawn out, and quite bizarre plot that in fact, shows Helen is incredibly stupid. Becuase Calling? She could have died. OR called on Lionel to fix this one. Anyway--she leaves, Lionel tempts her back with God knows what, she marries him, then drugs him, kills the pilot and jumps out, leaving Lex to die.
Murder of Lex, Take 2:
Helen has only recently crossed over into the kill-Lex camp, Lionel nad the SV mutants being the founding members, and upon being elected secretary, decides to kill Lex. All holds teh smae for plot.
Murder of Lex, Take 3:
Lionel told her something that scared her. Or she, echoing Lionel, fell out of love, saw the evil in Lex's heart, and decided he had to die. This is so implausible it hurts, which is why I'm actually leaning toward it.
Murder of Lex, Take 4:
She had nothing to do with it.
You know, I actualy have no idea, but speculation part 2:
How Lex Survives, Take One:
How Lex Survives, Take Two:
Rescued! By Clark! Or someone.
How Lex Survives, Take Three:
And does the word "Identical" mean anything to anyone? Just checking.
Chloe's playing Lionel. You cannot convince me otherwise.
And Lana cried again. This makes me smile, too.
Someone is going to be coherent, but that's not me. Because Clark is The Sex with that red thing going on, and Lex is trying to defy death and I am going to love this summer. Love it.
- svreview: exodus, s2e23